The depression of the weekend has passed, leaving a slight shadow. The nurse has been and the wound is almost done, just a slight rawness exposed when cleaned. The MRSA has cleared and she put a sliver of silvercel with the dressing to help stop the over granulating of the healing.
I'm dwelling on something the consultant said yesterday, about being positive and yet realistic. She says the Tumor will never go away. It's not how i see it and nor the way i will continue to look at it. There's no such thing as failure, only a different set of results. I know so many people now that were told either that they would die or never walk etc. Guess what, they begged to differ. So do I! Your reality is based on your conditioning, I can make it be anything i want it to be! Big C little c Bouncing HCC, the tumor might have got you but it won't get me!
It's wet and wild as this 4pm picture shows. Kali is looking at me hoping that by the fact that i'm wearing the outdoor walking clothes, it doesn't mean i'm taking her OUT in that. She's smarting from a visit to the vets yesterday to look at a gummy eye. She has eye drops to heal an ulcer and they took blood from her to check her thyroid levels. She's been lacking energy recently, sleeping too much.
=== JKrishnamurti.org - Daily Quote ===
Decision creates a contradiction
Thought is the process of choosing. Without thought you cannot choose. The moment you choose, there is a decision, and that decision creates its own opposite - good and bad, violence and nonviolence. The man who pursues nonviolence through decision creates a contradiction in himself. Thought is essentially born of choice; I choose to think in a certain way.
I examine communism, socialism, Buddhism; I reason logically and decide to think this or that. Such thought is based on memory, on my conditioning, on my pleasure, on my likes and dislikes, and any action born of such thought will inevitably create contradiction in myself and therefore in the world; it will produce sorrow, misery, not only for me but for others as well.
Collected Works, Vol. XI - 164
This is happening now
2 years ago